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Confessions of a slap collector

Interview with Ash, or rather an “Ice breaker” as himself called it.

Hipster moustache and vintage beret: Ash blends in perfectly with the Shoreditch style. With his look, you could easily believe him to be a sale assistant in a vintage shop or working as a barber in those retro hairdressers. Nevertheless, Ash found a more innovative way to earn his life. This intriguing artist and collector of 37 years old spends most of his days sitting on Brick Lane with a “5 pound for a slap” banner. Recently, he’s also been selling his own artwork, a passion witch reflects his views on society. Noticing he has a bike and actually doesn’t live on the streets but in a house with four other adults, this man became the most interesting “homeless” I’ve ever encountered. As I invited him for drinks to have a discussion about the consumer culture we live in, I was glad to see how sensible he was to the subject of possessions. With a coffee and pen in hand, the relaxed icebreaker session could finally begin.

When asked about the world and its recently traumatic events, Ash makes it seem like there is no hope for Utopia. “I feel like I’ve been living in World War 3 all my life… I’ve never seen peace anywhere”. Stating that originally, men would fight for tea and opium, Ash mentions there is always a new things to fight for; which now is petrol. While talking about the inhuman aspects of our society, the homeless with a home gave his best example of an outrageous act: stoning. How can women in other parts of the world still get rocks thrown at them until they meet death? In spite of that, we both agreed that there have been improvements throughout the centuries regarding acts of torture.

I then point out to him how his “Five pound for a slap” banner reflects on how morally wrong the human being can be. Ash says he got the idea from sleeping out on the streets. Strangers would kick him in his sleep so “why not make money out of it?”. The artist wanted to find a creative way out of begging as well, which is a type of harassment in his opinion. “I never come to people, now people come to me”. After two years of collecting slaps, he has received 27 of them so far; all procuring him a “weird nice funny buzz”, like adrenaline. Ash admits that his innovative method of getting attention also makes him feel more important in life. Like many of us, he is “an attention seeker” who tries to find ways in getting noticed. Yet unlike many of us, Ash has de lucidity to recognise it.

Abandoned by his father while he was still a child, Ash has many reasons to be disappointed by humanity. There was a point in his life where he needed professional help but didn’t have the money to afford it. Knowing that if he went in prison he would be fed, clothed and sheltered for years all while being followed by psychiatrists, Ash made the decision to commit his most “selfish act”: plead guilty for a crime he did not make. The artist could then enter what he describes as a “sanctuary”, a safe-zone where he could focus on himself, “where I had time to meditate”. He even admitted that he misses prison, stating, “It’s only your liberty that’s missing”. How can a human being prefer to live without any personal freedom? Is the outside world so bad that prisons make you feel less trapped, not caught up in the vicious circle of capitalism?

Ash’s life never really came close to the Hollywood scenarios. At the age of five, he drank his first drops of alcohol and at eleven, he tried drugs for the first time. A few years ago, his dad tried to re-contact him and managed to find him on the streets of London. “I only met him for a couple hours – he is a proper cunt- was in a position where he could have helped me but didn’t”. Ash explains that after he got the manslaughter story out of his chest, his dad laid a judgmental look on him and the willingness to help his son vanished. “That throws a spanner in the work”, confessed the father before walking away forever (again).

The social experiences of the slap collector could explain why he values personal belongings as much as he claims. “Possessions are all I have, it’s everything for me”. Intrigued by this statement, I soon realised that the objects Ash values the most are the ones which enhance his creativity. Would he want to own all the clothes in the world or get the most expensive watch? No. On the contrary: Ash is fond of antiques, collecting whatever is old, always looking for a good bargain. During our conversation, he waved a used orange piece of plastic in the air, declaring that it is a material for art rather than garbage. “Everything can be used, changed and arranged”, states the artist. Ash therefore doesn’t have a craving for monetary objects, but rather sentimental ones. The lock on his bike for example, is his oldest possession – and to tell by the look on his face, he considers it as his own venerable treasure.

The homeless with a home explains he could be starting work tomorrow if he wanted to. Nevertheless, disagreeing with inequality, he refuses to be another victim of this capitalist society. “I’m fed up with people like my mum working so hard yet living in a gate house while her boss owns a mansion- it should be the other way around”. Though that wouldn’t be fair either, Ash has a point. How can we find the motivation to work when we are not given enough value? The artist is confident he has the potential to be successful and achieve wonderful things, yet he feels like life hasn’t given him the chance to express himself according to his wishes. His rebellious attributes reinforce his willingness to live a life doing what he wants and when he wants to. With his slap method, he manages to gain enough to survive and produce a few paintings. Though it’s not always as easy as it sounds, it’s a way of life, and Ash chose his.

Freed from the constraints of a stable job, Ash confesses he is still not entirely happy. The desire “to be on top” restrains him from accessing full satisfaction. What the artist craves more than anything is a space where he can unleash his creativity and produce as much artwork as possible. “I don’t need to make money with art, I just need money to survive”. When I asked him what he would do with 1 million pounds, he answered, “I’d buy a gallery, a studio space with a bed near by, paintbrushes, wine and a bag of weed.” In other words, not much but enough to keep his passion alive, which in return would make him feel “at the top”.

Ash dreams of a community in which everyone owns the same amount and is valued equally. A type of utopia where money wouldn’t matter like it does in our modern societies. At the end of our Icebreaker session, I asked Ash who or what he would most want to slap in the face, he replied “My father. But what would I put to sleep? Money.

Imagine a life with no judgments, a world where creativity is encouraged and social status is of no matter since everyone is equally valued. Does our shift in a consumer culture drift us apart from the visionary imagined Utopian world? Ash says he has experienced a sense of community amongst the homeless or wanderers of the streets. Unlike with the rich, – who stay rich by not giving anything away, just keeping it all- Ash has exchanged and received more with others who live rough.

If you dream of Utopia too, start sharing more and spending less. Let’s stop living in a world where we can pay for slaps, and start living in an ethical world where slaps shouldn’t exist.

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